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Mar 27 / Danielle Wright

College is Hard, But College Relationships Are Even Harder

College is hard. There are exams, essays, lectures, assignments… so much stress and so little sleep! The only thing harder than college? College relationships. I’m not just talking about dating relationships, but friendships too. College is a time of change and discovery. People grow up, grow apart, or get too busy and it can be hard to maintain or start relationships.


Remember your best friend from high school? The one that you’d hang out with after school, go out with on weekends, and stay up late talking to on the phone about your crush? Well sadly, the truth is that once you go away to college that friendship may not be what it once was. You’ll begin leading your separate lives and you’ll talk less and less and only see each other once a year. But guess what. That’s ok! People change and drift apart. It’s just part of life and it’s bound to happen when you go off to separate colleges and start to pave different paths to your futures. It can be a difficult reality to face, but just know that it’s not your fault. It’s part of growing up. The great part of college is that there are so many different types of people and the new friend possibilities are endless!


Dating in college can be tricky. We’re all in this awkward stage where we aren’t ready for marriage, but we want something more mature than those high school relationships that failed as quickly as they started. You’re still learning about yourself and making new discoveries about what you truly want. Being in a relationship can make it hard to truly find yourself, but at the same time relationships can help you learn. The easiest part of starting relationships in college is that you meet new people everywhere you go. The hard part is trying to balance a relationship, friends, work, school, and extra curriculars. It can be exhausting and with so little time to commit to a relationship it can be hard to maintain a healthy one. The biggest thing I’m personally learning about dating in college is that you can be in a relationship and really love someone, but during the course of that relationship you change. The person who entered the relationship freshman year isn’t the same person when junior or senior year rolls around. You grow up. Sometimes you grow in the opposite direction of your partner. That’s when you have to make a choice. It can be the hardest decision to make and be one that you grapple with for awhile: to stay in the relationship and make it work, or go your separate ways and embrace the change.

Overall, college is hard and trying to figure out your different relationships can be intimidating. But just know that growing apart from old friends and finding new ones is normal. Not wanting to be in a serious relationship or changing during the course of one is totally ok! Just don’t be afraid to start or end relationships. It’s part of growing up and in order to learn more about yourself, it’s a necessary part of college.